[Date Prev][Date Next][Date Index]
INKYTEXT 282 Part II
_ _ __ ______
(_) ____ / /__ __ __ / /_ ___ _ __ /_ __/
/ / / __ \ / //_/ / / / / / __/ / _ \ | |/_/ / /
/ / / / / / / ,< / /_/ / / /_ / __/ _> < / /
/_/ /_/ /_/ /_/|_| \__, / \__/ \___/ /_/|_| /_/
/____/
Issue No 282a Part II Wednesday 10th March 1999
______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______
Editorial correspondence should be sent to InkyText@lancaster.ac.uk
Subscription requests to Inkytext-distribution-request@lists.lancaster.ac.uk
______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______ ______
AGENDA
Part II
4. Paris Diary: Air Miles afford four days of beatific beavering (Part II)
5. Small Ads: Flat share; Atlas-ti course, Chest of drawers, Cars, Furniture,
Houses to rent, Wool wanted, Transcribing machine wanted, Peer Gynt, Events.
6. Readers' Letters: Hitching, Linux, TESOL, Ruskin, Garstang Incinerators,
Y10K, Alumni Bay Walk, HEFCE grant reports, Y00K.
4. PARIS DIARY: FOUR DAYS OF BEATIFIC BEAVERING (Part II)
---------------------------------------------------------
[THE STORY SO FAR: you last saw the editor at 4.30 on Ash Wednesday in
the silent Vincennes reading room of the Services Historiques de
l'Armee de Terre, where the excitement of his discovery has almost made
him 'do a Meg Ryan'. Now read on....]
THERE WERE TWO SHEETS. One was on the headed notepaper of the
Directoire executif de la Republique Une et Indivisible, signed
'CARNOT, President' and counter-signed 'La Reveilliere-Lepreaux
Secretaire-General'. The other letter to Augereau, from the Ministre de
la Guerre, and dated 'Paris le 12 Pluviose, an 5e. de la Republique...'
(31 January 1797) told me nothing I didn't already know from three
primary sources but added a different and even more telling
confirmation.
Not going into detail here, but it's entirely clear that from the
start that the heroic young general-en-chef (Bonaparte) was a devious,
egocentric, conniving, back-stabbing, two-faced monster of ambition who
couldn't bear to see praise going to any potential rival without taking
steps to suggest (modestly) that any success was actually his own.
(Doesn't mean he wasn't a brilliant tactician as well of course... but
as much or more in politics as on the field.) Reserve the file
carefully when the servitor shouts 'Mesdames, messieurs on ferme', and
emerge into the sunshine.
WEDNESDAY EVENING: back up town. Meet Simon Barlow (Cartmel, French
1990) for an aperitif. Formerly a Eurosport commentator, Simon is now
producing his own weekly broadcast on American motor sport that goes
out in 14 different languages. Gossip and reminiscence. Tells me about
hire cars all being registered in the Marne (51) when departmental
authorities took advantage of new autonomy to vary road tax by lowering
it. So profitable that the autonomy has now been removed. Happily
recovered from his frightening but benign cerebral tumour he has alas
lost all taste for alcohol, but we go for a meal (Au Bon Coin, rue aux
Moines - soupe a l'oignon, saute de porc, tarte aux pommes). Merci,
Simon.
JEUDI (SAINT BERNADETTE): Up betimes for a McMorning McSale' in the
Mcdonalds on the Place d'Italie. Same price as 2 years ago (17FF) and
they give you a fresh orange juice instead of the ghastly potato thing
you get here. Then down the avenue again, along the rues Claude Bernard
(purpose-built new offices for Le Monde) and Gay-Lussac to the
Luxermbourg and the Cafe Cyberia, rue de Medicis. Half-hour of telnet
(30FF) lets me check my email and delete returned Inkytexts. And
misfile a joke from Christine Flude.
BACK AT VINCENNES BY 10.15: It gets better. There's even a letter
confirming that it was the Directoire itself that commissioned from the
painter Thevenin the portrait of 'Augereau au Pont d'Arcole', now in
Versailles. Umm. Have to follow up that commission in the Archives
Nationales and Archives du Louvre on some other visit.
Ensure there's nothing more relating to November 1796 or the later
Italian Campaign in Augereau's personal file and move on to the other
dossiers. Wonderful but anonymous note on the portrait from some later
date. The Napoleonic armies may or may not have marched on their
stomachs but they certainly marched on their Minutes. HQ orders, HQ
Adjutant's implementation of orders in Tubby (Alexandre) Berthier's
distinctive hand, mission statements, marching orders, divisional
orders, regimental orders, brigade orders, Sitreps, bulletins, all of
them written out meticulously, and almost always - no carbon paper or
photo-copiers - re-written for the records.... What fun Ph.D students
could have correlating the versions...
NON-LUNCH DOWNSTAIRS by the coffee machine (excellent espresso,
2.50FF) and back to more Nov 1796 'registres' from the French army in
Lombardy. It gets worse... As early as 8th December the General-en-chef
(him again) ordered Berthier to get each demi-brigade and other active
unit to give an urgent account of its activities during the past 6
months of the siege of Mantua and the Po Valley campaign to date so
that its history could be accurately recorded. Some did it more fully
and assiduously than others. But then the whole lot have been
re-written by someone under HQ staff command.... Hmmm. On the version
I've got here some later archivist has pencilled in the comment that
there's reason to believe some of this stuff was written _after_ the
campaign. A bit like some university minutes. Happily bits of the
earlier version was published at the start of the century by the
meticulous Colonel Fabre.
EMERGE AT 5.p.m. mildly stunned and with an aching writing hand.
Decide to change at the Bastille and try the wonderful new Ligne 14
(Madeleine - Bibliotheque) nicknamed METEOR - metro ouest-est rapide -
designed to link the old Bibliotheque nationale with the new
non-functional Bibliotheque Mitterrand. Driverless trains with windows
in the bow... The only metro line with its own website. Get off at the
Halles and wander around the marche de la rue Montorgeuil (subject of a
famous Monet painting). Stumble on an astonishing restaurant (La
Perdrix) where as well as 80FF and 120FF menus there's a basic
businessman's lunch at 61FF that includes a 1/4 of wine AND is on offer
in the evening. 6.30 is a bit early to eat in Paris so settle down with
a paper and a Ricard then dine solo at 7.00 (saucisson, braised duck
bits in red wine, creme brulee). Back to the 13th arrondissment,
yawningly slump on the bed and fall asleep with the TV on.
FRIDAY: Vincennes for 9.15. Last chance this trip to tie up what I can
get from here. Quell curiosity and focus on Augereau's divisional
correspondence in the weeks after Arcola. Have run out of my daily
entitlement to boxes by 3.00 I note some class-marks for a later
occasion and call it a day at 4.00.
GET OFF AT CHATELET for a sentimental wander - but it's raining quite
wetly. Pompidou centre still under wraps but they've opened the library
as the BPI Brantome in the old underground supermarket premises of the
quartier de l'Horloge. Ravenous since I've had no lunch again, but
reluctant to try any of the (much increased) international fooderies
now all around. TGI Fridays, KFC and Pizza Hut have arrived in the past
two years, and their are Japanese, Chinese, Italian and Mexican fast
fooderies everywhere. Have an apero to keep dry, read Le Monde, debate
when and where to eat, then wander out still undecided.
Stumble across a teenage-tourist orientated sort of French place
called Taxi-Shop off the rue Saint-Denis. Blaring music, half a cab and
large screen TV. It's also fairly empty and has 49FF menu - enough to
decide me. Huge mixed salad, poulet and frites, remarkably good (and
copious) fresh Creme Caramel. Even a half bottle of respectable Cotes
Du Rhone is only 27.50FF. Amazing.
SATURDAY 8.00 a.m.: last morning and all mine since the archive is
closed. Check out, lug bag to metro and head Gare-du-nordwards. At
least the automatic lockers are operational again (price unchanged),
though to get to them you have to go through manned airport-style
security and x-ray machines.
Then leg it unladen and carefree down the Rue Lafayette towards the
eponymous Galleries. Strike off briefly to sniff (literally) around the
market in the Rue Cadet and buy some artisanal smoked slices of magret
de canard and pricey cheese. Makes sense to carry only gifts with a
high price-weight ration when travelling by air. Down along the
boulevards and notice that the Rue Montmartre metro (famous source of
tourist confusion) is now renamed 'Grands Boulevards'. Buy books for
children from the massive new Megapole book, video and record discount
store. Along to Strasbourg-Saint Denis and back up full-circle to the
Gare du Nord on foot. Rarely has a brief trip been so fruitful.
FASHION NOTE: if KOOKAI, Pro-Mode, Burton-Femmes, Au Printemps and
Courreges are anything to go by (and they are), light grey is the new
black. Accessorize with cream and white.
5. SMALL ADS
------------
FLAT SHARE OFFERED: Very attractive 2nd floor flat near city centre,
to share with one other and cat. All usual facilities, use of garden.
Available for one year. Rent 50 pounds per week plus bills. Contact
Jessica Abrahams on 92670, email j.abrahams@lancs.ac.uk. Home tel. no.
015242 62280
---------------
FOR RENT: 2 Bedroom character cottage in rural location (outside
Bentham) with garden and garaging for rent - 450pounds p.c.m. contact
Graham Chapman, Geography - g.chapman@lancaster.ac.uk extn 93737
------------------
WOOL WANTED: HELP! Are there any knitters out there with a spare ball
or half a ball of Littlewoods Baby Double Knitting, 50% Acrylic 50%
Nylon (White). I would be eternally grateful, please call Lilian
x92179.
----------------
PEER GYNT,ROYAL EXCHANGE THEATRE, MANCHESTER SATURDAY 13 MARCH, 8pm
Tickets for this well reviewed production of Ibsen's 'Peer Gynt' with
David Threlfall in the title role are still available, price pounds
23.80, including transport from campus. If interested, contact Janet
Clements, j.clements@lancaster.ac.uk, ext 94477.
-------------------
WANTED: Adult tricycle with child seats. Make me an offer I can't
refuse! langhorn@jireh.co.uk
----------------
ATLAS-ti TRAINING AND USER GROUP: Is anyone interested in joining a
group of people to organize a training course in Atlas-ti, which is a
piece of software designed to assist in the analysis of qualitative
data (both text and image based). Rather than go individually on
courses outside of Lancaster, we thought it would be better to get a
trainer to come here, and then to continue on as a user support group.
We would need around 10 people to be viable. Please could you let
Rachel Fligelstone (ISS) know if you are interested.
-----------------
FOR SALE: CHEST OF DRAWERS 5 drawers, c. 1960's - 20 pounds ono phone
388694
---------------
URGENTLY REQUIRED - transcribing machine. For current and ongoing
research projects I wish to purchase (or possibly rent) a transcribing
machine. Does anyone (or any department) have a second-hand machine for
sale or possibly to rent for six month period? I don't mind if it's
standard size or micro-cassette format as I will buy the corresponding
type of dictaphone/recorder. Willing to negotiate a good price. Please
contact Helen Woodruffe (Marketing) on ex.93918, e-mail
H.Woodruffe@lancaster.ac.uk
----------------
FOR RENT Two bedroomed house with small study in Lancaster. Good-sized
kitchen and living/dining room. The house has central-heating and
instant hot water. THe enclosed garden at the back has a fantastic
pear tree in it. To rent from April 1st at 320pounds per week. Please
contact Mags on 383220 or Cen on 68577.
----------------
FOR SALE: E REG, MONTEGO ESTATE 95,000 miles, taxed and full year's
MOT Good condition, starts first time and used daily, blue, radio, 625
pounds o.n.o. email m.kemp@lancaster.ac.uk or tel (01524) (5)94464
office hours or (01524) 822560 evenings
-----------------
FOR SALE: Peugeot 405 GLX, 94 L reg. A ir condition, electric windows,
six speaker stereo, power steering. Only 39.000 miles. Full Peugeot
service history. Excellent condition. Optional transferral of 3 months
Peugeot warranty. Reason for sale: Job abroad. Price: 3 995 pounds.
Phone: 01524-849802 E-mail: e.petersen@lancaster.ac.
-----------
ITEMS FOR SALE, (leaving 6-bed house for 2-bed cottage) PAIR OAK
DINING CHAIRS; Ikea TABLE LAMP also black stand for music centre;
various LONG VELVET CURTAINS, good quality, brown, blue, gold, green;
two Egyptian leather pouffes; 1920s 7-piece BEDROOM SUITE: dark oak
twin beds with head/foot-boards; two-door wardrobe with central
bevelled full-length mirror and drawers with recessed brass handles;
dressing table with triple bevelled mirrors and matching stool, chest
of drawers, bedside cabinet - could sell separately) WOODEN COAT STAND
with hooks and umbrella tray; framed print of Bosch's GARDEN OF EARTHLY
DELIGHTS with 2 books on the painting; Prestige pressure cooker.
Contact Lynda Burke, tel. 841169, e-mail Castlecomm@compuserve.com
-----------------
TRANSLATION, INTERPRETING, TRANSCRIBING, PROOFREADING, WORDPROCESSING
(and CV design as well): full-time all-the-year-round professional
service.Contact Lynda Burke at CASTLE TRANSLATIONS, tel. 841169, e-mail
Castlecomm@compuserve.com
---------------
IRISH CEILIDH DANCE. Why don't you come? In aid of MedALERT - the All
Lancashire Emergency Response Team charity. Tickets are only 10 pounds.
This cost includes a ceilidh band, Irish dance demonstration, Irish
stew and soda bread. At the Crofters on the A6 at Garstang. Sunday 21
March 1999 at 7.30pm. Tickets available from Lynda on ext. 92615.
------------
Radical Environmentalism and DiY Culture
Thursday 11 March at 4.15 in
C48 Fylde College.
Our guest will be Susannah Bowyer (PhD Student at Cambridge
University) 'Lesbians in the Mud 1982-1999: Dykes, Dirt and DiY Culture
in Britain, Aotearoa and Ireland' Her talk will be on personal
reflections on involvement in environmental activism, alternative
living and lesbian communities. With particular attention to recurring
themes of land and property, nationality and identity.
All are welcome
Queries to Tom Cahill 593309 or 593321 or t.cahill@lancaster.ac.uk
-------------------
INSTITUTE FOR CULTURAL RESEARCH
"VISUAL DOCUMENTS"
"THE MEDICAL GAZE"
Roberta McGrath
(Photography, Film and Television Napier University)
Thursday 11 March
4.00 pm, Furness SCR
Roberta McGrath is Associate Lecturer at Napier University in the
Department of Photography, Film and Television. She has contributed to
Heron and Williams "Women Writing on Photography" and Williams (ed)
"Cinema: its beginnings and its future".
---------------
6. READERS' LETTERS
-------------------
As an Apple Mac user living in a Microsoft-free zone, it was with some
smug satisfaction that I read about the collapse of the Exchange e-mail
software which the university is moving towards. However, it was with
great sadness that I recently heard the news from someone in technical
support that the university is intending to move everyone to the
Windows platform. I believe that this concentration on Microsoft
products and Windows is an incredibly short-sighted decision.
BTW, auditors and accountants may be interested in the following
stories from ninfomania...
<tech//2.5> MAKE MICROSOFT REFUND YOUR OS
Afficionados of the Linux operating system, say they will demand their
money back for Windows software installed against their wishes on PCs
they buy. Their demand is based on a Windows licensing agreement that
says that if the purchaser does not agree to the terms and conditions
of use of the Windows software, he or she should promptly contact
manufacturer for instructions on return of the unused product for a
refund. http://www.linuxmall.com/refund/
<tech//2.2> BIG BLUE WEARS THE RED HAT
I t seems like someone in IBM was reading last week's feed as the "Make
Microsoft Refund Your OS", has come half true for future IBM customers.
Big Blue will now install both the Linux and Windows NT operating
systems on its Netfinity line of network servers, in a decision that
follows similar moves by Hewlett-Packard and Dell. IBM will offer
technical support of Linux through an agreement with Red Hat Software,
distributor of Linux. http://www.ibm.com/
<feed//0.1> Ninfomania is the number one weekly NewzFeed for the
contemporary digirati... use the online form available here:
http://www.ninfomania.com/
[Worth mailing to yourself and reading over a coffee during a slow moment at
the office]
---------------------------------------
Your correspondent claims to have noticed 'a serious fall in the
number of drivers stopping to give lifts'. That's odd. As a winter
car-driver my observation is that there are many fewer people hitching
these days.
Steve Elliot
Computing
---------------------------------------
I've actually noticed a surprising drop in the number of people
hitching in the last few years. Just one thing to mention though, and
I know it's been said before - not everyone who drives by without
picking up hitchers is being selfish (or remembers Rutger Hauer). Some
of us don't actually drive through town on our way home, and the looks
of 'Selfish Git' some hitchers give you are not appreciated.
Maybe a 'thumb down' gesture could mean, "Give us a lift to Galgate,
mate?" Not that I live there, but I bet nobody's ever hitched to
Galgate without resorting to felt tipped pen on card.
Marcus Duffy
Engineering
------------------------------
Having spent 7 years in Lancaster as both staff and student (and
unemployed) and also having gone through periods of being with and
without a car, I feel appropriately qualified to comment on the sad
state of hitching.
1) There is a vicious circle at work, in which few people _want_ to
hitch, and thus fewer give lifts. The fewer who give lifts, the fewer
who will see it as viable to seek a lift. Once, there used to be queues
of people at both posts in the morning and evening, but now, hardly
anybody is there.
2) As hitching becomes less common, the idea of hitching loses the
'collegial' status it enjoyed once and instead signifies in the same
way as in a non-university sense, ie, dangerous. I assist in the
welcome for new students at the train station every intro week, and as
the bus carrying them to the University goes round the city, I point
out various landmarks. When I point out the hitching post and explain
hhow to use it, I get looks of incredulity. I've not been able to
decipher whether they signify incomprehension at the thought of
hitching, or a lack of knowledge about what hitching actually is to
begin with...
3) I have a feeling that students with cars are less inclined to offer
lifts than they once were. We can attribute this to many things, but my
own candidate would be that we can hardly expect anything more from a
generation who have only known a Labour government since May 1st 1997.
There seem to be a lot of students who drive very new cars who are very
reluctant to share said cars with others...Most recent hitches I've
been offered have been from people just using the sports centre who
have no other connection with the University.
Finally, some observations on the behaviour of those who don't want to
offer a hitch...
1) Drive as close as possible to the roundabout as fast as you can.
2) Avoid eye contact with a hitcher at all costs
3) If eye contact is made, point towards Galgate emphatically
----------------------------
In a recent issue you mention various courses for which Senate
approval is being sought. This includes an MA in TESOL ('Teaching
English to Speakers of Other Languages') which is to be run in Hong
Kong. Your description leaves the clear impression that this is a
Chinese University of Hong Kong course that we are validating. This is
not the case. The course is a slightly modified version of the MA in
Linguistics for ELT that we (Linguistics and Modern English Language)
have been running for many years.
We will have complete control over the 'Hong Kong version'. This
includes the selection of students, organision of the programme,
decisions regarding content, and all teaching (to be shared by
Linguistics and the IELE). The degree awarded will be a Lancaster one,
and the role of the Chinese University of Hong Kong will be to recruit
students and provide the local administrative and academic
infrastrucure in the form of classrooms, libraries and IT facilities.
For these reasons, if QAA were to show interest in this particular
course, we are confident that we could satisfy on all counts.
Keith Johnson,
Linguistics
---------------------------------
In response to your correspondent who suggests that cyclists are
perspirational rather than inspirational - are these mutually exclusive
attributes? In relation to raising parking charges before providing
alternative means of transport being problematic - this is a classic
chicken and egg coupling.
However, for Lancaster residents, alternatives already exist (I have
been pleasantly surprised at the adequacy of the bus service). The
marginal cost to motorists of even a 500% increase in charges would be
minimal - not really enough to make you 'poor' (if you can afford a car
you are by definition not poor) - but would make paying public
transport charges more attractive. Perhaps your anonymous correspondent
could answer me this - why is it that defenders of the private car
always seem to think that their interests should be protected at the
expense of others?
Jane Hunt
Centre for the Study of Environmental Change
--------------------------------------------------
Selfish? Now how can I as a cyclist be selfish? I know, it's because I
have never offered anyone a lift! I do most humbly apologize.
I have been called selfish for many things in my life, but for not
wanting to drive to work thus causing even more congestion, is really
taking the biscuit. Your motorist drives past my front door every day.
Any chance he could give me a lift because I don't like to get my bike
wet?
-------------------------------
> RUSKIN IN THE RAIN: the recent heavy rainfall has yet again caused
>problems in the roof area of the Ruskin Library. The points of ingress
"Therefore, when we build, let us think that we build for ever... For,
indeed,the greatest glory of a building is not in its stones, or in its
gold. Its glory is in its Age." (John Ruskin) But hopefully the eyesore
will fall down soon....
[NOTE: Nah, surely not a BSKYB prizewinner... but, as you know, I don't
consider it an eyesore _per se_ , quite the contrary. It's merely the
location I think is wrong. Plus the leaks of course. And I fear I may
never entirely warm to the visual contents, though the catalogue
suggests the library contents are rather rich. (Ed.)]
-----------------------------
A planning application to build six dead animal incinerators at
Catterall, near Garstang, has been re-submitted. The original
application for this development, which is in close proximity to
residential housing, was withdrawn due to lack of an independent
environmental report.
Any assistance in fighting this application would be welcomed. In
particular those able to examine and respond to the technical
environmental evidence, produced in support of the application, are
sought. If you can help, please contact m.baldwin@lancaster.ac.uk
----------------------------
University Cross Bay Walk, Sunday 9th May. Put this date on your
calendars now. Those of you who are members of a college should be
invited via your college. Those of you who are not, please email the
alumni office (alumni@lancaster.ac.uk) to indicate interest in going on
the walk asap. - yes, you can bring a small group. Cedric Robinson,
Queen's Guide to Morecambe Bay, wants numbers so he can plan the walk.
Walkers are to be sponsored to raise money for Library Books, College
projects (Colleges will enumerate these), or Summer College for Access
bursaries.
Emily Fay
Alumni Officer
----------------------------------
It seems that we can forget about the Y2K problem - but worry about
the next one! A recent advertisement for a Quantex Pentium III PC
stated that it was "Year 2000 and 9999 Compliant"! However it carries a
one year warranty only and states nothing about its Y10K compliance!
---------------------------
[From the MANTEX news letter]
YEAR 0000 CRISIS - A Note
Message from: Rome
January 18, 1 B.C.
Dear Cassius,
Are you still working on the Y zero K problem?
This change from BC to AD is giving us a lot of
headaches and we haven't much time left. I don't
know how people will cope with working the wrong
way around. Having been working happily downwards
forever, now we have to start thinking upwards.
You would think that someone would have thought of
it earlier and not left it to us to sort out at
the last minute.
I spoke to Caesar the other evening. He was livid
that Julius hadn't done something about it when he
was sorting out the calendar. He said he could see
why Brutus turned nasty. We called in the
consulting astrologers, but they simply said that
continuing downwards using minus BC won't work. As
usual, the consultants charged a fortune for doing
nothing useful. As for myself, I just can't see
the sand in an hourglass flowing upwards.
We have heard that there are 3 wise guys in the
east working on the problem, but unfortunately
they won't arrive till it's all over. Some say the
world will cease to exist at the moment of
transition. Anyway we are continuing to work on
this blasted Y zero K problem and I will send you
a parchment if anything further develops.
Plutonius.
---------------------------------
I was amused by the typical contrast between the two accounts of the
grant announcement that fell into my mailbox last Friday. The Inkyflash
cynical as ever. Then Vickytext spinning the facts in best Press Office
PR fashion by presenting things in the light most favourable to us.
However your version was closer to what The Times said.
[NOTE: Thanks (I think). Note that Vickytext is not always written by
the Press Officer... and indeed running it through my own primitive
Inkystylofit routine suggests a 93 percent probability that Friday's
was written by the Planning Officer. (Ed.)]
--------------------------------
QUITE ENOUGH, DON'T YOU THINK?